Everyone’s favorite and loveable Misfit, Glenn Danzig, is no stranger to ending up in the news regularly for some pretty absurd reasons such as picking up supplies for his kittens, angrily throwing bricks after a number of complaints from his neighbors, eating cake, beating up on photographers, and getting knocked out by local band North Side Kings’ very own Danny Marianino back in 2004.
Punks and Metalheads alike can all agree on their appreciation of his hi-jinks and absolutely cannot deny his love of furry felines and snacks. While he was busy this year putting out new music, promoting, and performing for fans (aka real work), he also found time to give us even more reasons to love him and participate in our favorite sport: Danzig Watching. Without further ado, I give you The Best Danzig Moments of 2017 with the sincerest of hopes that 2018 will top it.
5. Danzig Bans Cellphones at Misfits Reunion Shows
If you’ve ever been to a Danzig show, then you’re familiar with his “No Camera” policies. Having a personal experience with this policy in my former years as a photojournalist after having been given a photo-pass from his management then arguing with the venue about why I wasn’t throwing out my VERY EXPENSIVE camera just because he didn’t want anyone to know he was getting old, I can tell you this is a subject he is VERY SERIOUS about. Then again, what isn’t he serious about?
Needless to say, it was no surprise that following a 2015 incident where Danzig put a dude in a headlock over trying to take a selfie with him in the background, The Misfits announced that ticket holders were required to lock their phones up in a pouch away from the stage areas. I’m not really going to fault the man for not wanting an obnoxious sea of blue screens at the shows he said would never happen, but the weird “locking stations” make us wonder if he got an additional kickback from Yondr, the company that made them.
4. Henry & Glenn Adult Activity and Coloring Book
Okay, so Danzig had nothing to do with this one, but it’s still fucking awesome! The creators of the Henry & Glenn Forever comics decided to go one step beyond and bring all the punk rockers the best gift we could imagine by letting us take part in creating heartwarming works of art featuring our favorite imaginary couple. You can snag a copy of your very own over at Microcosm Publishing while they last.
3. A Danzig Has To Eat Too
We can all say what we want, but the man has been part of some of the most legendary bands of all time. He could even be called a legend himself, if one were so inclined. However, between all the sudden reunions, a long awaited album release, the big Blackest of The Black Festival, and strange “collectibles” for sale this year, you kind of have to wonder if The Other Man in Black is a little strapped for cash in his Golden Years. Between auctioning off his Original Misfits Skeleton Gloves and The Official Misfits Fidget Spinner (this is a real thing, I swear) we are really left scratching our heads over what Danzig will have up for grabs next in exchange for food coupons.
2. Danzig Conspiracies Unleashed on Jonesy’s Jukebox
Earlier this year, Danzig appeared as a guest on Jonesy’s Jukebox, hosted by Steve Jones of legendary Sex Pistols fame, and the results are pure Danzig gold complete with some interesting responses from Jones.
Is his cold a result of biological warfare from the government? Are the California wildfires actually an act of terrorism? What kind of phone does he own in order to prevent the government from spying on him? Does he even Rock ‘n Roll? Find out the answers to these questions and more in the MUST HEAR interview of the year.
1. Good Housekeeping With Glenn
Of all the strange pieces of Danzig history on the market this year, this one really took the bricks, as it were. For a mere 1.2 million dollars, fans had the opportunity to purchase Danzig’s former home (yeah, the one with the bricks, bitch) which also happened to belong to Lucille Ball in previous years. It almost sounded like a dream until photos from the interior of his “as is” property surfaced at Death and Taxes Mag.
A look through the photos let rabid fans know that for a little pocket change, they too could play Name That Misfits Stain, possess severely outdated boxes of half-eaten monster cereals, befriend rats that once knew Danzig himself, breathe in some Blackest of The Black Mold, and even possibly fog out some heavy metal cockroaches. Hell yeah!
The house has since been pulled off the market without any notation if it actually sold or not, but bets on the exact amount of termite damage are still being taken. Aren’t you just kicking yourself for not snapping this dark paradise up for yourself?
Bonus Round: Top 5 Danzig Memes of 2017
To start off your New Year right, we’re giving you a bonus list of our favorite 5 Danzig Memes from 2017 as seen on the Danzig Memes Facebook Page. We’re big fans of their daily dose of Danzig memories and feel that you might be as well. If you haven’t jumped on that train, it might make an excellent resolution for well-being next year.